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One of the most difficult life lessons is learning to let go. How do you know when it is time to let go of people and situations? By nature, people are acquisitive; we want to keep whatever we find because we believe they belong to us. It doesn’t matter whether these things are good or bad. It is this belief that leads to destructive relationships, to unfulfilling careers and the unwillingness to constantly reflect on one’s fundamental values, much less change them. We hold on tightly to things because it is very easy to form habits. And our habits – whether they are our thoughts, words, or actions – are not easy to break.

Ironically I think we hold on tightest to the things that aren’t meant for us because at some level, we know they aren’t really ours. We’re always seeking the love we know we don’t have. We’re always trying to prove the things that are not entirely self-evident. I don’t know about fate. But I do know the things that are ours don’t require us to mentally and emotionally latch onto them to remain. That the best things are never forced, are never created out of ultimatum, never leave us reeling and questioning them for months or years at a time.

I am not recommending that we give up on whatever we find difficult under the guise that, “it is not meant for you” because a little difficulty is good for the soul; it makes you humble and resilient.  The things you need to let go are those that take away your peace and no longer support your growth.

How long are you going to hold onto people and situations that don’t fulfill you? How long are you going to sacrifice your own values and soul just to prove to others that you are worthy? If you see your truth here, then you have got life all twisted. See, life isn’t about proving yourself to others.  As bestselling author and life Coach Iyanla Vanzant says, life is about moving though, moving on, growing up and growing through every experience. Life is about examination, elimination and recreation.

It is scary to give something you have been chasing all your life. But have the courage to leave it all to the complete grace of God knowing that He is always working everything through you and together for your greatest good. Know that everything good is from God and nothing at all is from you. It is God doing it through you and the other elements in your reality so there’s nothing to hold on to as your own, all you have to do is to have the right beliefs and let God do it.

Today is perhaps the perfect time to let it all go. Close your eyes, inhale and then exhale letting it all go out. Let go of past hurts, past grudges and resentments.  When you release all the unnecessary stuff you are holding onto, then you will be able to receive new experiences and people that are waiting for you.