Let us talk about families, shall we? The ones we come from, the ones we wish we came from, the ones that shape us, and in some cases, break us. Celeste Ng’s Everything I Never Told You is not just a book about a family; it is a profound exploration of the complexities of expectations, love, loss and identity. It is a novel that hits you like a freight train, leaving you breathless in its wake, yet somehow forcing you to want more of it even as you wipe away your tears. The book opens with a punch to the gut, introducing us to Lydia Lee, a promising young girl whose death serves as the catalyst for the unraveling of her family’s secrets. Lydia, the golden child in a family where nothing seems to be as it appears, has always been the embodiment of everything her parents hoped for. She is the perfect student, the perfect daughter; so perfect, in fact, that she is held up as the standard to which her siblings, Nathan and Hannah, are measured. If that doesn’t sound like a recipe for disaster, I don’t know what does.
But here is the thing: Everything I Never Told You isn’t just about Lydia’s tragic death. It is about all the things we don’t say, the hopes we silently place on others, the burdens we are too afraid to speak aloud. Marilyn wants Lydia to be a doctor.
As we get to know Lydia, we also learn the intricate dynamics within the Lee family, set against the backdrop of the 1970s in America, a time when race and gender roles were not just pressures, but suffocating chains that bound every member of this family in their own way. Her father, James, an immigrant from China, has been fighting an invisible war to be seen, to be valued. Her mother, Marilyn, has a vision of Lydia as the child she believes can break the barriers of the world for her.

But here is the thing: Everything I Never Told You isn’t just about Lydia’s tragic death. It is about all the things we don’t say, the hopes we silently place on others, the burdens we are too afraid to speak aloud. Marilyn wants Lydia to be a doctor. James wants Lydia to be accepted in a world that sees him as “other.” Meanwhile, Lydia is trying to figure out who she is, and whether she even has the space to do that.

Ng’s writing is exquisite, poignant and deeply human. She dives into the raw, painful depths of family life with such insight that at times it feels like she is peering into your own family history. The story is a tapestry of unspoken words, missed connections, and quiet heartbreaks. Each family member carries their own emotional baggage, their own regrets, and Ng doesn’t shy away from pulling back the curtain on their imperfections. In fact, she invites you to look, to examine to understand.
What is devastating is how much of Lydia’s life is dictated by the expectations of others. As a reader, you can’t help but feel for her, trapped in the unrelenting pressures of both her parents’ dreams and society’s cruel biases. Her death isn’t just the loss of a person; it is the loss of all the unspoken things, the “what-ifs” and “if-onlys” that permeate every relationship. It is an aching reminder of how sometimes, we can’t save ourselves from the weight of everything we never say.
If there is one takeaway from Everything I Never Told You, it is this: Sometimes, the most important things are the ones we never say aloud. And sometimes, the things we never said are the things we most need to hear. You will find yourself parenting with greater awareness, embracing the present moment, and allowing things to unfold naturally rather than adhering rigidly to expectations.
If I were to sum up the theme of this novel in one sentence (which, let’s be honest, is nearly impossible), it would be this: The things we leave unsaid often shape us the most. The silence, the invisible expectations, the invisible pain that families live through, all lead to one thing; a reckoning. Everything I Never Told You is a painful exploration of that reckoning.

But this isn’t just a bleak, tear-jerking read; it is a book that also explores hope, resilience, and the possibility of redemption. There is beauty in Ng’s portrayal of Lydia’s family, even in their heartbreak. You will find yourself hoping, just like they do, that somehow, someway, they will find the courage to break free from the cycle of silence and misunderstanding that has held them hostage for so long. If there is one takeaway from Everything I Never Told You, it is this: Sometimes, the most important things are the ones we never say aloud. And sometimes, the things we never said are the things we most need to hear. You will find yourself parenting with greater awareness, embracing the present moment, and allowing things to unfold naturally rather than adhering rigidly to expectations. This is the book you will want to talk about for hours. And I don’t mean just with your book club (though, let’s face it, this would be an ideal pick). I mean with anyone who will listen. Because after finishing this novel, you will want to unpack it, dissect it, and let it linger in your mind long after the last page is turned.
In short; it is a gut-punch, it’s heart-wrenching, and it’s brilliant. Do yourself a favor; read it.



Celeste Ng: A Writer Who Speaks the Unspoken
Celeste Ng, was born in 1980 in Pittsburgh, Pennsylvania, is a child of Chinese immigrants, which gives her writing an authentic lens on the nuanced dynamics of race, belonging, and the silent expectations that shape our lives. Her debut novel, Everything I Never Told You, a New York Times bestseller, earned critical acclaim for its raw and insightful portrayal of family dynamics, loss, and the weight of societal pressure.
Encourage your family to see cleaning as a way of honoring the home they live in a space that nurtures and protects them. Invite them to join in the cleaning process, and as you work together, use it as an opportunity to bond and create positive memories.
Ng is also the author of Little Fires Everywhere, another bestseller that explores class, privilege, and the tension between personal and societal expectations. Set in the suburban town of Shaker Heights, Ohio, Little Fires Everywhere takes a deep dive into the lives of two families, the seemingly perfect Richardsons and the unconventional Warrens, and examines how race, class, and hidden truths shape their destinies. The novel was adapted into a critically acclaimed Hulu series starring Reese Witherspoon and Kerry Washington, cementing Ng’s place as one of today’s most compelling voices in contemporary literature.
If you are looking for a writer who can make you reflect on your own life and relationships long after you have turned the last page, Celeste Ng is an author you will want to keep reading.